In the beginning, I had my name
and my name was CORSAIR…
and God saw it was GOOD!
So I kept it
and I grew with it!!
Yes, in the beginning was my name…
CORSAIR
And I know it was good because it came to me in the night…
and rested upon my shoulder…
It was a heavy burden, and God knew it to be heavy, but He gave it to me anyways…
And, one night, in September of 1989, God blessed my father to write me a letter…and he said:
”Dear Rich:
What does it mean — to love? The word is surely overused and often misapplied. What do I want you to know when I say that I love you? That I want for you that which is good! Being human, I have made mistakes. No doubt there have been many times when I have failed in my attempts to make this clear. Things which I have offered — ideas, plans, advice, activities, beliefs, oppportunities, and material items — were all an expression of my love because I considered then to be good. Maybe I an make y point by giving a few examples.
In 1965 you and Charlie were left at Elkhart while the rest of the family made a tenting trip to Washington and New York City. Even though you kids probably enjoyed the 10 days with the Quinlans, it wasn’t the same. So the following year, we made a big trip to Montana and Yellowstone Park — and you two little guys went along. (And because you had never been to Washington, I flew you and Charlie and you there for a weekend during a visit to Mary Kay’s family in Berea.) Remember this trip to Springfield, Ill? As the older kids left, we tried to fill in by doing things with you and Charlie that you might have missed when you were younger, or for which we had neither the time or the money to do earlier.
When you were a little guy, it really hurt me to know that you were ignored or mistreated by the older kids in the neighborhood. Remember my getting you a new bike because the older kids had made a wreck out of the old one by slamming into you. And when it was stolen because you left it somewhere, I felt almost as bad as you did. When you were in high school, all of my recollections are pleasant ones. You were a fine student. It seemed to me that you were whole-heartedly involved in most everything. Both junior high and senior high band (surely having had piano lessons was valuable to you at that time.) By my book, you were successful in football and hockey. I’ll never forget the night at Blake when you knocked the New Prague player head over heels while taking the puck from behind the net clear down the left side of the rink. And I was happy when you started dating your senior year. Some of your parties were at our house were a bit rawkus, but it seemed like innnocent fun. Do you remember when I suggested popcorn to your French hosts when you wee getting ready to go to Paris?
Since the spring or 1980, God know your road has been rocky. When you first went to Mankato and landed the job in the Mexican restaurant, I rejoice in the totally optimistic letter you wrote that day. And I shared your disillusion and disappointment a week later…Later that fall when I insisted that you arrange your own transportation back and forth from your school, you thought I was a heartless ogre, but my purpose was to help you develop a sense of personal responsibility and independence. You were the only Melcher kid who was ever given a car to use while in college.
The Christmas vacation you spent with John at Rosebud was a wonderful gesture on your part. The lettter you wrote when you came back was beautiful! I was so proud of you that I pulled it out and read it to the group at one of our Friday Serra Club luncheons! It was then that I became aware of your ability to express yourself on paper.
As you should recall, when you changed your major at Mankato State University (MSU), I made little of no protest. Regardless of what I might prefer, I have always let our children decide their occupational bent. Because I love each of you, I want you to to be happy in your chosen life-work. During the spring of 1984, I sensed in you a fear of having to leave college and find a job. So I asked John to suggest you investigate the Jesuit Volunteer Corps (JVC). And because you have a pretty unselfish attitude, you were willing. It seemed to us that your first year at St. Leo’s was rewarding and fulfilling for you. The fact that you weren’t making big bucks didn’t bother me. It seemed that you were happy — first and foremost — as well as learning and maturing. The second year started off fine, but when you came home for Thanksgiving, the situation seemed less positive.
The past 3-1/2 years have been a bummer for you. Would that we had the power to give you happiness and satisfaction. How little regard wo give to health until we are deprived. God grant you a change for the better — soon and permenantly.
The past 2 weeks have been hell for all of us. Some things will not be the same again. Wounds heal but scars remain. None of us is free from regret, but a willingness to forgive is a must. Jesus hear us!
with love from a father who wants for you that which is good ——“
This letter from Dad just showed up in my mail area of my kitchen at 6:30 pm lat night, and my life has never been the same. Dad’s insights and affirmations blew me away! And, looking at all the red pen marks throughout the letter, it seems like—even though I do not remember when I scrolled them—that I must have been TOUCHED previously, when I have read this letter in the 35 years before.
My hope is that each of you who read this letter get a sense of the vast and powerful LOVE my Dad had for me, and was able to express here, is a clear sign of how much he loved each of you!!
Rich